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Date:	23.10.2005 18:42
Name:	Kyrie
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Put in more detail and this could be really good.

Date:	15.10.2005 1:02
Name:	Lia Bloom
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Nice! Pretty good start, need to build up a bit more suspense or maybe even get a better beta reader. I'm sure tons of people would be happy to help, but I wouldn't. Sorry. Well, love that your German! GERMAN'S ARE AWESOME! Anywhoo, I just wanted to review so that maybe you could keep writing and write faster, because I'm extremely interested in this story. Thanks a bunch!

Date:	18.2.2005 22:13
Name:	polkadots
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Um good start but I think you need to get some help from a beta reader, I would be happy to help.

Date:	16.1.2005 18:24
Name:	claire bloom
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Considering you're German, you're not doing too badly! lol. Well done. Enjoyable first chapter. Good work.